


This Conversation had to Happen at Some Point

by orphan_account



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-21
Updated: 2019-04-21
Packaged: 2020-01-23 13:46:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18550993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Just a conversation that must of happened at some point.





	This Conversation had to Happen at Some Point

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first story, be nice.

I was confused, no I was very confused. Nothing anyone was doing made sense! Everyone was calling me Sneezy and the entire town was in a panic. For some reason they were afraid of the mayor (more than usual) and this thing called a wraith.

Anyways, I was sitting at my friend Walter's house. I'm sneezing as Walter, a drunk guy named Leroy, and four other men are all staring at me.

"Okay, would you like to tell me what's going on?"

"We're dwarfs."

"Happy!"

"Dwarfs?"

Dwarfs? What is that supposed to mean?! Sure we all technically have the same disability with the word dwarf in the name but what does that mean!? Is that why they were calling me Sneezy? Because they think I'm a dwarf!

"Um.... let's start from the beginning!" Leroy says.

"Sure." I say uncertainly.

"So this entire town comes from a world of fairytales."

"Okay you lost me."

"Don't worry, it will make sense eventually." 'Happy' says.

"No it won't." Leroy shakes his head. "But we're telling you anyway."

"So the mayor is actually the Evil Queen and you know Mary Margaret Blanchard and David Nolan?"

"Who doesn't?"

Those to were infamous in this town for their secret affair. The town's anger at Mary Margaret went down after she was wrongfully accused of Kathryn Nolan's murder. But the town is still thought of David as a coward. As for the evil queen thing, if Regina Mills was a fairytale character she'd probably be a villain.

"Mary Margaret is Snow White."

That I did not see coming. Then again she did match the description. Extremely pretty, black hair, pale skin. Plus, besides the whole Kathryn thing she was kindest person you'd ever meet.

"Okay, I guess that fits."

"Yeah but back then she was more of a badass."

"Mary Margaret's a badass?"

"Mary Margaret, no. Snow White, yes." Doc states. "Mary Margaret is the person Snow would be miserable being."

"So wait, Mary Margaret is technically Henry's stepsister?"

"Try not to think about it to much. But hey, you're opening up to what we're telling you!"

I didn't want to! But come on, what they were saying was really cool.

"Oh and David is Prince Charming."

"And whose Kath-a-r-yn?" I sneeze.

"Charming was engaged to Princess Abigail before meeting Snow."

"So," Leroy went on. "Regina hated her stepdaughter. But, Snow never told us why."

"You know how the story goes!" I said then sneezed. "The mirror said-"

"Screw what the mirror said! Those stories barely got anything right! If Regina did everything she did because a piece of furniture says someone else is prettier, I'd freak! I'm shocked they knew our names! And also how did they our names?"

"Because they made it up. Snow White is just a story parents tell their children before bed."

"Back to the very real story! Regina sent Graham, who back then was the huntsman, to kill Mary Margaret. But, Snow showed him this emotional death letter she wanted him to show to Regina and he spared her. Then Regina ripped out his heart."

"Ripped put his heart!"

"Oh yeah, Regina is magical and ripping out hearts is something dark sorcerers like to do alot."

"That's creepy."

"No kidding, so after that Snow became a bandit, constantly running from the queen."

"Wait, so Mary Margaret's a princess and a bandit and a teacher."

"After a while she met and fell in love with Charming but when she broke into his castle to tell him his dad threw in the dungeon."

"David has a dad?" 

"People tend to have fathers! Now next time, interrupt me on something worth interrupting!"

"Now, I was also in jail because I was accused of stealing this diamond for Astrid, who was Nova back then."

I opened my mouth but Leroy glared.

"The nuns are all fairies. The head dwarf and Mother Superior, who was actually called that along with being the Blue Fairy said Nova and I couldn't be in love. And I stole the diamond to say sorry for listening to them."

"Well that's sad."

"I know, but moving on Snow and I met and talked about love and other crap. Until finally Stealthy, the eigth dwarf freed us. Stealthy told us to go one way, but Snow said the other, so we separated, and I went with Stealthy."

"Which one of you is Stealthy?"

"When we went Stealthy’s way the gaurds at palace killed him. Snow found us, gave up her life for me, I was a free man."

Everyone hung their head in sadness. They clearly thought this was all true. A part of me really wanted to believe them, but come on! It's to amazing to be true.

"I'll tell the rest." Walter spoke up. "I'll case you didn't get it, I'm Sleepy, you're Sneezy, and he's Grumpy."

"Yeah, I kinda assumed."

"Now Grumpy got us and told us everything. We went back to save Snow, which we obviously did. But she told us about Charming and how his father forbid them from being with each other."

I try to imagine Mary Margaret, as a badass, telling us about a charming man named David.

"Now through a bunch of other adventures, we got Charming and Snow together, well they got each other together but we were kinda there. At the very end Regina gave Snow a choice; let David die or sleep forever under a sleeping curse."

"And that sleeping curse was enacted by biting a poison apple?" I ask then sneezed.

"After that, Snow and Charming took back the kingdom. But, on their wedding day-"

"What did Regina cast a curse and that's why we aren't dwarf knights in some castle."

"No she promised she'd cast a curse that took us to this realm. That's why we're here."

This is all kinds of confusing.

"But first Snow and Charming had child which they put into a magic wardrobe that made by Marco."

"Is he Geppetto? He seems like he could be Geppetto. But where's Pinocchio? I mean in this story."

"Marco says Pinocchio somehow escaped the  curse. Apparently he was August."

"The other new person?"

"Yeah and about the first new person, Emma is Snow and Charming's baby."

"What?!? Were they two when all this happened!" I say forgetting how crazy this is.

"The curse prevented anyone from aging. Regina wanted everyone miserable forever."

"That's still creepy!"

"After a while she decided she was bored having everything so, well, predictable, and adopted a baby, which just so happened to be the son of the only person who could brake the curse."

"And then Henry got Emma to come to Storybrooke."

"And Regina tried to put the savior under a sleeping curse but Henry took the Apple. But don't worry, Emma kissed his forehead and he woke up and broke the curse."

"Okay, and you believe all this?"

"Yes!" They all replied.

"So say this is all true, then why can't I remember?"

"We wanted to see what happens when you cross the town line." Leroy explained. "You picked the shortest straw, and apparently, cross the border, loose yourself again. We're sorry."

"Okay, so say this is true. I'm an actual fairytale, and I can't even remember it. Fi-fi-fix"-I sneeze-"this!"


End file.
